Working right the way through; with a few people I care for, and one or two I heartily dislike (I was pleasant and courteous to all). Got finished early in the AM; about half an hour later an old acquaintance - a young lady, no less - texted me saying she was nearby, and was I still up? I was still up; and…

Plus whoever the guy is fantasizing about, the truth of exactly who's taint was pressed up against those briefs - now pressed up against his nose and mouth - is likely to be way, way worse.

I imagine the fact that you own an endoscope must be the clincher.

May I also add my My favorite Christmas-related quote, courtesy of Seinfeld:

That's such a shame: I've dated up to 6'1" - literally - and down to 5'zip", with any and all dimensions in-between more than welcome. Good luck to 'em all I say! It's so much easier to meet great women when your type boils down to "Cute, smart, funny, not an asshole".

In his eagerness to be smug, trite and barely witty, Dan also gave the guy possibly the worst advice that he could muster: "Try hitting on taller women." I used to date a woman who was 6'1", and she said that it was the bane of her life on a night out to have guys 5'4" and under coming up to her and telling her "I've…

I will just add one other thing:

(except Rob Schneider)

Seconded, albeit from a heterosexual perspective: I've found two women in 20 years of being sexually active who were capable of blowing me to climax, and yet I've still enjoyed the rest of 'em if only from the visuals alone.

Close friends and partners: why not?

Honestly:

Winding down like a Mayan calendar, apparently.

Great reaction shots from Winslet and Witherspoon.

Johnny Ryall: so laid back and funky, with that fantastically subtle guitar riff slung low in the mix but tying it all together.

"Pendulant" is a word! I never thought I would apply it to labia, but here we are at Savage Dik time again…

"Pendulous" sounds a little too much like "ponderous" to my internet-comment-reading ears. I'm a fan of vaginas of all configurations (easy on the '70s Earth-mama muff tho there ladies!), but "ponderous labia" suggests something a little too 'low-slung' even for my taste. Like Snuffleupagus, only I want to put my…

From the British equivalent of The Onion: http://www.thedailymash.co….

You have provided me with some very good advice over the last six months, and I have seen a lot that you have given others here. You read situations well, often relate them back to to trials and triumphs from your own life, and are always looking to get to the emotions of the people involved (rather than just the bare…

I'll second everyone else here who obviously has a past involving way too much poor judgement: the gift-giving is only buying you a one-way ticket to Creepville.

Yep, a decent #1 all over (don't forget the shaft, careful round the old scrote): however happy you are with your crown jewels, very little in life - other than a c.1971 Pam Grier - ever looked better with an afro. A decent set of Wahl clippers can be had for around $25; also don't forget to shave your oxters and…