Molested her?

Whoa, whoa, whoa? He's got FIVE fvcking hellspawn?

Please tell me she has a giant vag on her face.

And Stewart, to be fair, was like, "I'm a comedian! You're a fvcking news channel! You're not supposed to be COMPETING with me! And I'm not supposed to be able to fill 22 minutes a night just riffing on the complete and total self-contradictory bullshit you spew all day!"

I mean, he can try to demand Pence resign…

That is very much true. There's been quite a few lovely pieces over the past two years talking with people who worked on the show, and it becomes blisteringly clear that the whole goddamn thing was made in the editing booth, and any actual "decisions" were made by the producers. Trump just had to show up, vamp off the…

Wait, really? I mean, I know Ukraine. I know Ukrainians. One thing we are NOT is organized enough to pull off a conspiracy.

Whoa, @Dikachu:disqus, we did a whole goddamn AVC meetup at Comet Ping Pong and you didn't get me the secret pedophile pizza menu? I'm hurt.

Thank god I'm still on my parents homeowner's insurance!
Yeah, they pay for it with their social security!

I love that this actually got over a dozen upvotes here. An obscure historical reference made on a pop-culture website's article about a stupid thing Trump did? Yes we can!

Yeah, now we get super mecha-dicks!

I'm idiotking, and I used to be able to!

What about tiny, granite hands?

Ugh, I gotta try to stay up late and be there. I miss you guys. Sharing my perversions on the Avocado just ain't the same.

I'm always here for ya, buddy.
(well, actually I'm over on the Avocado most of the time now)

Tell the newbies… it was me.

Are David Cross and Michael Stipe turning into each other?

As a follower of Papa Pio XIII, I demand Papa Francis pronounce an anathema on the Coca-Cola corporation!

Well, I just swallowed a nail, so….

Username/Comment/Young Pope synergy!