And most of them seem to have vaginas.

Let's hope there's enough naddage for the "let's put this turkey out of its misery" option.

That, and all the ice cream is gone.

Because they were a bunch of undisciplined, lazy, slack-jawed civilian morons?  This is the kind of shit that happens when you abolish the draft.

Down south we'd call it "getting ameobic dysentery."

Dearth of firearms-related accumen?

Ganz im Gegenteil, Herr Kaiser.  Socio/psychopaths come hardwired with the knowledge that the most efficient way to gain someone's trust is to look them in the eye.  Sadly, it's also one of the most efficient ways to let them see what's really in OUR eyes, and, well…you come to understand why you've always thought…

Can't wait for him to start taking zombie nads as trophies. 

Sure hope it ain't cheese steaks.  Cuz they're probably shit out of luck.

That's the true value of alcohol.  It gets us to cast aside all those stifling inhibitions.

I agree with you wholeheartedly, but, well…it's a family show and summary executions just aren't cricket, old boy.

They're hoping Carl will help them crack that elusive "pervy pedophile" demographic.

Be fair.  Would you have wanted to be "enlightened" by the fat Philly guy?  Or any other fat guy, for that matter:

Probably more of a NEW BROWN TROUT.  As if Chelsea Handler needed any help in making this years TV schedule more abominable.

Yes, he has a nice "pull out" [a military surplus sleeping bag that you pull out of a plastic bag], and his "girlfriend" [mom] is a "sound sleeper" [a milk of magnesia/percocet zombie] and he does have a "place to stay" [a garden shed]

Sarah Palin?  Bristle Palin?

Dare we hope that our eyes may once again behold the stunningly beautiful Indian actress who played Asha on "Outsourced?"  Dear Overlords of Sitcom Synergies, MAKE IT SO!!!

Get me to the general vicinity of her next appearance and I'll be happy to make you one for free.

Or pubes at the very least.

Then what does Taylor Swift make rubber look like?  Hopefully a body bag, with her body stuffed inside.