The best was yesterday, on ESPN's "Highly Questionable" when they did a supercut of Eli getting thrown down and beaten by his older brothers in a bunch of old home movies…
the crying was spectacular

SPOILER

"No matter how much you corporate dick shake & dance
the last drop always falls on your pants!"

First scene of the trailer…
Segel touches an unknown brown, liquid substance on a half-eaten plate of pancakes, gives it a quick taste, and declares

The entire second season will be based on a plot that involves Diane Kruger replacing a dental bridge in Demian Bichir's mouth, under a time constraint, while the villain threatens to take pictures of their toothbrushes being used in "unusual" places

Make any sandwich taste great with Best Foods' "Old Terrifying Mayonnaise"!

Give you an example; show you what I mean: suppose you're thinkin' about a plate of shrimp. Suddenly someone'll say, like, plate, or shrimp, or plate of shrimp out of the blue, no explanation. No point in lookin' for one, either. It's all part of a cosmic unconciousness

Burn(t) (by my tailpipe) Notice

If you're squeamish, whatever you do, DO NOT Google image search
"Joe Theismann Leg Injury",
because about 50 other photos of baseball, basketball, soccer, etc. leg break photos pop up.

Sometime after that, David Letterman did some skit where he had a pencil sharpener that looked like Joe Theismann, and the leg was the crank on the sharpener…

♬ If you're having DVR problems
I feel bad for you son…
I got 99 problems
but a "Breaking Bad" marathon ain't one ♬

The Last Vampire 2 - Don't Bury Me 'Cause I'm Not Dead Yet

A few years back, at the now-defunct Bourbon Street casino, the most awful show was Hypnolarious!, a bad hypnotist show, featuring Deogee, the Hypno-Pup

So is Courtney Love…

But probably not New World Order

cut to: Beck's face emerging from a pot of beans

We're just getting the news…
It's official…
The AV Club is changing it's name to "Tiger Beat"!

They should cast Wiley Wiggins as Robin, so we can see Batman take a paddle to him, and we can have a new "Wiley touches his nose" drinking game

♫ Shot at the night
and you're to blame
you give new wave
a bad name ♫

Somewhere…
Harlan Ellison has put the lawyers on Defcon 3