LIES! The membership is up to 50 million and rising every day!

Nonsense. We'd never single out racial minorities for that sort of treatment. Anyone, of any race, who leaves the church is treated equally.

Sounds like something that should get someone thrown in the hole.

He's the greatest musician ever.

He never does that to dissenters. They're just really clumsy.

I think I remember reading that in a pamphlet.

Everyone's always told me that that's the best way to handle criticism. Plus, the last person who suggested it might not be was badly beaten mysteriously outside of David Miscavige's office. No one knew who did it.

Really, the Church of Scientology's only objection is that the film isn't properly described as a documentary. It's a work of fiction, designed to the defame the clearly very tall David Miscavige, the tall and heterosexual Tom Cruise, and make miserable the lives of ordinary church folk who just want to live their…

Finally, somebody saying something sensible!

He's 6'1", according to his official church biography.

It's like goldy or bronzy, only with iron?

It's not for torture, it's for intense physical re-education and training.

No, it's a great name. L. Ron Hubbard came up with it when he was 8.

Russians could learn a lot from the teachings of the great L. Ron Hubbard.

But all non-scientologists ARE lying about Scientology!

Your body will die, but your true self will live on forever. At least once you hit OT VI.

Every piece of literature I've ever been able to read about the Church of Scientology has only described it in the most glowing of terms! If you want an evil cult, try psychiatry.

Really, if you're not purging negative thetans, are you really better off alive?

We're only afraid of the government, which is out to get us, not from Miscavige at all. He is in no way utterly terrifying.

Maybe you shouldn't judge Scientology until you've given them $50,000 dollars or so? They help lots of people!