"Once I kill Saxon, I can move to Argentina."

It's always funny when people who aren't being bombed by NATO say "History will vindicate me."

I keep hearing vaguely negative things about it but reviews seem generally positive. What's your take?

No, because I've played Fallout: New Vegas.

Not "lose my virginity to," but the first time I made out with a girl it was to "Fight to Survive" from the major motion picture Bloodsport.

I imagine the Soviet Union's national anthem would occupy a paradoxical space wherein it is simultaneously the worst song to bone to and the best song to bone to.

To share my well-wishes with all the Mad Men fans out there, who, presumably, find it an entertaining show and good for them really.

Too incompetent to work as an underdog dance flick, but not nearly weird enough to qualify as howling camp, Battle Of The Year is destined to please only bad movie buffs desperate for a fix of awful dialogue, blatant product placement, and clunky exposition. However, pure badness is an acquired taste; viewers who…

This is a disgrace to everything I believe in.

Not really. I meant to post this last week but got distracted by a butterfly or something. And honestly, it's The Atlantic. Not saying they're above sleazy tactics to boost ad revenue, but desperate, Buzzfeed-style clickbait usually isn't their thing.

Yeah, I get how pompous and Internet a long-winded post like that looks to a lot of people, but trust me, this is after weeks of making smaller comments to them that got increasingly dumb responses. That wall of text was pretty much me getting frustrated and recapitulating every point at them in the most condescending…

Which is the most chilling theory of all. TV criticism ain't exactly cardiology; you can get by with very little understanding of your subject matter. But missing gradual, decade-long trends? Like "watch TV in order" or "dramas are good" or "stop playing with your goddamn phone during the episode"?

Which is why the AV Club needs to avenge my death.

I'm not saying AVENGE MY DEATH or anything here, but….plewse avenge my death.

Then Google "kegel exerciser", which will provide much less horrifying results.

I originally went with the "trolling/pageviews" theory at first too, but the amount of time they spend defending this stupid idea, coupled with the fact that they deleted my account and posts, tells me they seriously believe this isn't a dumb idea.

Esther definitely isn't as bad as Phillip and seems much more willing to qualify her comments, but she still sucks and is still incapabl of providing anything close to the analysis we get here. She's also been much worse in other episodes.

For posterity's sake, here's the deleted post:

So I know it's a bit late to share this, but I'm gonna bring it up again over the next two episodes because it's too hilarious to miss: The Atlantic Wire hired two critics who had never seen Breaking Bad before to review its final season. As in, they had zero idea who Hank or Walt or Jesse were, or any prior…

Joshua, if you don't give the final episode an F, you're a pussy. There. I said it.