Oh man. I am adopting "FOUR LETTER FILTH MOUTH WORDS" into my repertoire. It sounds like something Carrie's mom would say.

Remember, remember, the 3rd of September, when time itself became sentient and snarky.

EVERYONE ALWAYS DOES!

It's as if Miley has split into two different women, one dark, one light; one sexual, one innocent. I don't see what David Lynch has to do with any of this.

@avclub-92f0aaf782f117403757301fbdccb3ae:disqus It's through Jenette Goldstein gulch.

Too soon? Look, he's actually smoking! In the picture!

In the Syfy version, the water will be played by CGI, which will be played by a piece of blue taffeta being rippled by stage hands like a god damn 1880s trompe l'oeil theatrical production.

I bet you wish you hadn't smoked now, you robot son of a bitch!

No such thing. Why would you say that? Why would you say that terrible thing?

"Jesus Christ, Morgan. I didn't think it would do you any good, but this is literally killing you!"

Planes 2, 3, 4, Baby Planes, and a spinoff featuring several minor characters are on the way!

Well, being possibly in league with the Satan always magnifies the hawtness.

This is a Liz Pena town, pardner. You're best off just to keep on walkin'.

I have a cordless power drill with a little LED light under the (spinny part—it probably has a proper name) that lights up by itself when you push the trigger just a little bit. Frankly, it's the most brilliant thing in my house, including myself and my wife.

This band looks like the guys who live in your old apartment that you moved out of because you can't afford the rent in that neighborhood any more.

Hard Wick Soft!

For a self-described "nerd," Chris Hardwick doesn't seem to understand that we have this thing called "the internet" where we go to hear dumb assholes talk about our favorite shows. (Yeah, this thing is on the internet, but, you know.)

I think these movies are of a pair with Sucker Punch. Perhaps somebody needs to see them, but I don't need to be castigated for interests I don't have. I like cartoonish, Kung-fu movie violence, and I like scary ghost-story horror, but I don't like movies with realistic violence and I don't need a jeremiad about it…

This is the adaptation of that game you used to play on your Nokia cell phone in 2002.

Dude, I heard that, like, if you have, like, really good subwoofers, you can, like, get this cd of this like, tone, that's just the right frequency to make chicks, like, totally make out with each other.