You're going to end up looking at your own optic nerves.

That game was intensely badass.

There's the librul msm for you: balancing a paranoid dominionist lunatic with a milquetoast political operative. Why can't conservatives get a fair shake?

"This one's for you, Paula," he said through tears. "They can't keep white people down forever!"

Lot of things to be upset about today. The casting in a Michael Bay film isn't one of them.

Lot of things to be upset about today. The casting in a Michael Bay film isn't one of them.

Yikes. I guess 87 years isn't enough to see a decent adaptation of your undead-themed novel. I hope Max Brooks is doing his cardio.

"WE WILL BURY YOU! WE WILL BURY YOU! BUT THEN YOU WILL COME BACK AND BITE US…

I think you've figured out all the missing steps before:

@avclub-d72f705337e5adcf7e33ec0381c5f5b2:disqus Hush! You'll only make you-know-who show up.

Aww, if I had known I was to be soothed, I would have washed my hair this month.

Dammit, should have gone with The Zweaqwel.

Electric Zwooaloo

ARE YOUR LIVES SO EMPTY THAT YOU PAID REAL MONEY TO WATCH MR JOLIE DO THAT FOR TWO HOURS!?!

Role playing as what? Zuggtmoy Demon Queen of Fungi?

Selma Blair has fled Anger Management for a more dignified role in a Todd Solondz picture.

Seriously, dude. You write for underemployed geeks. We reflexively look for the Simpsons reference like phototropic plants do the sun.

"If the alien ships can't connect to the mothership once a day, they'll shut down entirely and we can destroy them!"

The people in Town Line didn't know what Cesar Chavez looked like.

Buck Dharma is beyond your limited sexual categories.