When you bland Will Smith slap it?

I'm doing my part, assholes.

That would explain the zombie anthill.

*yanks rope, bucket of water pours on Aldo's (body double's) body*

It sounds like Hollywood is where the record industry was ten years ago. Like them, it'll respond by going as bland and as broad as… hey, Man of Steel, $125 million? I'm not going to bother to finish that sentence. But when they cast the next Batman on a reality show, don't say I didn't warn you.

I Robot was actually a bland Will Smith actioner for which they bought the rights to the book simply to slap something familiar on the title. Did I phrase that right?

Garry Marshall? It's Garry Marshall, isn't it?

Dammit, Bobby. That Sam McFarlin is as funny as a case of the piles. Just cutting to a non-sequitor isn't even a dang joke!

It's a gem. A horrible gem with penis torture.

He was great in that movie about the aliens. You know, Titan AE.

The only possible explanation for Scooby Doo is that it was an elaborate charade put on Shutter Island style for the inexplicable amusement of a pack of the retarded children of multi-millionaires. And they would have gotten away with it etc. etc.

And ice packs for the animators' wrists.

I think that might be because that's a dream you had when you had strep throat in 6th grade.

There has never been a "creative" organization with as laser-like a focus on making their money with no effort than Hanna-Barbara. Their shows make the Iron Man sequels look like Jean Cocteau's Orphic Trilogy.

That sounds like an Iron Butterfly 45 played at 33 rpm.

White people don't need to be taught to line dance. It's something they're just born knowing, like the way a colt can walk when it's only an hour old.

Pennsylvania, but the Kentucky part of Pennsylvania.

Maybe I'm just very old (I am,) but in middle school they made us square dance.

The ESPN connection is very clear: this is what all music sounds like when you've had half of your cognitive function destroyed by multiple concussions.

The "Inside Baseball" on podcasts does seem to have gotten a little thick of late. I've basically stopped listening to the Sklar Brothers, they've become so slurpy.