Who will play Stephen King…
…in the disgustingly embarrassing part where he wrote himself into the books?

Almost anyone can get their J.D. from South Columbia State University Online.

This will succeed…
…only if Bill and Ted wear sunglasses, goth apparel, and remain expressionless while traveling through time.

The movie wasn't the only thing that blew.

I really enjoyed that one kid…
…in The Vampire Apprentice.

I hope cyborgs with Austrian accents come back for all of you!

Are you guys serious? Little Eddie Furlong in his pubescent squeak extolling the virtues of being cool, maaaannnn.

Great…
I wonder if a higher frame rate would've kept T2: Judgment Day from being the most dated fucking movie ever?

Top Chef Executive Producers
…can now sleep knowing that Top Chef: Fix What We Did to Blais was a resounding success.

His appearance on that MTV special…
…was a complete riot. I've never seen Denis Leary look so uncomfortable. Of course, I wasn't there when he was confronted about stealing Bill Hicks' jokes.

Too bad Steve Zahn ruined that movie too.

Mr. Landgraf, did you renew Justified?
What am I, an asshole?

Watching "The Fighter" in HD will give you a good indication as to her real age.

Never saw his season, so honest question…
Is Zev a prick or are his little temper tantrums a by-product of his mild autism?

They did that in the season with the Voltaggio brothers too. When it came time, it turned out they had reversed the camera angle in post-edit. I wouldn't read too much into it.

She very well could be. Either way, she takes it all very seriously and could definitely tell you how she feels about U.S. foreign policy… and doughnuts. Yummy, yummy doughnuts.

I'm a thick-necked white guy…
…and of course I love this show. Actually, I think they do succeed in creating some palpable tension in a show whose format doesn't lend to real tension. It's kind of that organic thing, like you get when watching TV poker. God, I'm so white.

Uh oh, the tables have been turned on me!

Olivia Munn…
Proof that pretty girls lack real personality no matter how hard they try. If she had spent her formative years a little fat or awkward, she'd be better.

At least Anastasia disappeared. This bitch is in the forefront.