Dr. Smith's appearance with Pimpbot 5000 on Conan O'Brian was legendary.  "Why, whatever are you talking about, you clattering conglomeration of cogs & camshafts?" remains my penultimate inspiration for alliteration. And for regal dismissiveness.

Hmm…if I were carrying a trombone around the band Phish, I would use it to beat the living fuck out of them for all their shitty music.

Holy shit, a white guy AND a black guy…I'm seeing DOUBLE!

Yes, but it's a lesson that tends to creep up on you without you noticing it.  Stay in school kids.

Rodriguez may have stretched the limits of comic-book escapism to their breaking point here.  Still, that scene from "Desperado" where Trejo kicks ass on a team of mercenaries remains pretty fucking awesome.

He's dead, Jim.

No it was Maggie Seaver.  I had this verified via peer-review, as this is very scientific stuff we're doing here.

Tangential "Growing Pains" reference: I once lived in a room over someone's garage, so the girl I was on a date with at the time made the comment, "Oh, so you're like Mike from 'Growing Pains'".  The moral of the story: if you're 32 years old, and living over someone's garage, you've made many, many bad decisions in…

But Maggie, Mike and Ben need to learn some responsibility!

It kinda sounds like it's trying to work in that stupid "Royal Tenenbaums" formula of stacking wackiness on top of more wackiness.  Call me a contrarian, but I despise everything about Wes Anderson films.

Janet Jackson's nipple!

Five Easy Pieces was one of the best performances ever.  The one-sided "dialogue" he has with his father on the beach always brings a tear to my eye.  And I know it's hackneyed at this point, but "hold the chicken" still inspires me to say "fuck off" to stupid, authoritarian bureaucrats.

Speaking from the experience of someone who has worked with, uhh, "fingerpainters", that scene where Kyle's parents walk into the bathroom to find "Merry Christmas!!!" smeared on the walls, and Kyle holding a chunk of shit in his hand, is remarkably accurate.

Shit yeah.  Russell is pretty highly-rated at this point in his career, but I'd say he's still wayyyy underrated.

OK, allow me to amend my comment: "…the best VIABLE candidate of the Republican bunch".  When Gingrich started pulling ahead, I was getting nervous.  Although, as a fan of Dan Savage, the "Santorum Surge" made me giggle uncontrollably every time Hannity would bleat it out on his radio show.

As loathsome as I consider Romney, he was the best of the Republican bunch.  Compared with Santorum's uptight, pinched, "man-on-dog" face, and that human toad Gingrich, he would've been a pleasure to vote for.

If I remember from my Comparative Anatomy classes, birds, fish, and reptiles all have a combination butt/vagina.  Best not to think too hard about it.

"Well-honed mediocrity" might very well be my new favorite phrase.  FYI, well-honed mediocrity is what happens whenever lawyers get involved.  This is why whenever I meet a lawyer, I make a point to puke on his Lexus in the parking structure.  It's best when the sunroof is open.

No, I'm pretty sure that was in the first one.  I wish they'd given me creative control, because baby John Wayne Gacy would actually be pretty awesome.

That makes the Bowie/Jagger remake even more salient.  Too bad that video still creeps me the f out.