Is she the one with the tits?

Jabba & Comic Book Guy had a baby.  A big hairy baby.

Udo Dirkschneider rocked it.  He was like a louder, meaner, German-er Bon Scott.

I've put a lot of consideration into this, and I've determined The Red Hot Chili Peppers are The Worst Band Ever.  Not because their songs are particularly bad, they're just not-good, and there are so many of them.  I feel the same way about The Eagles.

I can never tell if she's good-looking or not.  I mean, if she were my secretary, I'd probably be trying to get in her pants.  But she just doesn't cut it as far as actress material.

I found a clear vinyl pressing of Witchfinder General's "Death Penalty" LP.  I Almost got cover model Joanne Latham to autograph it, but she (rightfully so) got creeped out at the idea of someone obsessed with a nude photo of a crossbow pointed at her head learning her address.  She'll come around someday.

Play Freebird!

I only wear custom-made shoes with suede soles.  Size 9.  I may be a white boy, but I can sneak up on you without a sound in those bad-boys.

Funny.  Every time I see that Josh Duhamel dickweed, I think "Don't see this movie".

She's a little pork-chop.

Slayer's Angel of Death?

(Extends middle finger) "Here's your Freebird, dickbreath!" (Plays "Southern Man")

It's like a precursor to Slayer's "Dead Skin Mask".

It's like a precursor to Slayer's "Dead Skin Mask".

I'd say "Reign in Blood", but that album is more like getting pistol-whipped.

I liked "Back in the Village" before I even knew about the TV show.  When I started watching Prisoner episodes I started getting the references.

Watch "Ms. .45" instead.

She's not real attractive.  That's why she puts all that shit on her face.

"Back in the New York Groove" is a million times better than any KISS song.

Watch the Tom Snyder KISS interview.  Ace is completely drunk off his ass and still makes Gene look like an idiot.