That got personal quick.

…Stan Smith? Or was it Dan?

See? That's the kind of fun stuff I miss out on. It doesn't have to be good. It just has to be bearable and interesting. The only thing i got last time was a Third Man single of Pujol's "Black Rabbit." I love the song, but for shit's sake, it's a single.

Hawkins wasn't bad, actually. Of course, they picked a song without any golden gold voice theatrics. Did you see the smile on Dave's face? Priceless.

To be honest, Jack seems like a fairly intense person. If we'd met in person, I doubt I'd be able to get past both this and his celebrity.

That skit was terrible.

But will you suck on her dick? I did. It was blue raspberry flavored, the best of the fake fruits.

Fuck you penguin.

But, living well's the best revenge.

No

Only if you don't count havarti. And, come on, who wouldn't count havarti?

Holy fist of the dragon batman!

Fuck you Akron-Canton. Graeter's is THE shit. Aglamesis can suck a dick. Don't fuck with a Cincinnati boy's foods.

Even if you don't enjoy the show for the sake of the show, it still makes you look hip in front of your 13 year old female friends that look at least 20. I mean, come on! Fiona, you're killing me.

…Yes? Maybe.

But, you'd totally play any game associated with the Stripes in any way, right?

Staircar1, I really wish my record store had performances, but I live in Cincinnati, which contrary to what I have been told and observed, has no bands that are willing to perform at a record store.

Just join Satan. If you get behind Jack, you get on his good side.

What the fuck just happened?

What if he only watched it for Jack? That makes it okay in my book. No performance will ever match up to any Jack White guitar seizure.