Too soon

I was once told that the phrase "formal shorts," unlike what I previously thought, is not an oxymoron. To which I say bullshit. Wearing shorts to a formal is event is like wearing slippers in public.

Whenever I see a globetrotter do astrophysics on a chalkboard while doing something with a basketball that I cannot do, it makes me realize that I have not done shit with my life.

That is depressing as shit.

John DiMaggio deserves nothing but our worship and human sacrifice. He's like a white Phil Lamarr except you can generally tell what parts John plays. Phil's more of a chameleon.

I tend to say "But I'm not done vomiting" when someone asks me If I want to resume something.

According to IMDB, it's Djambi. I assume the "D" is silent.

I trust the orgy pit has been scraped and buttered?

It just got heavy in here. If it makes you feel any better, the Bengals have really good players that live up to their potential a lot of the time but still get buttfucked every time they sniff the playoffs. We epitomize underachievement. At least the Jag's emblem is cool.

Still don't understand why they fired Harmon over Chevy. Changing the entire tone of the show would alienate more people than firing an actor who is clearly an asshole. But, to this point, agreed.

Let me add quickly: why the fuck would you bring in Will Ferrell to play a shitty character and tease that he would replace Michael but then essentially kill him off and spend five fucking episodes looking for replacements that were just cameo actors playing lunatics and then decide on California—which I thought was a…

What if his friends can't hold an actual conversation so they keep saying the first thing that comes into their heads? Sometimes random just means stupid.

If Erin marries anybody, they're a lucky dude. I hear she gives a mean bj.

When do we find out it was some coma patient's dream?

It would be harder to hate said state if 99% of it's denizens didn't agree. That one percent would be Bruce Springsteen, Patrick Stickles, and Snooki. No, it's not mathematically correct.

Is that the reason behind the weirdly old popular articles?

Agreed. And everything Nile Rodgers touches turns to gold.

But Coldplay is indefensible.

As do most people who care about the shows they watch.

Just got the anniversary addition (maybe?) of Things Fall Apart on record store day. Not sure why it was a record store day release, but it was on the shelf and godammit I bought it.