Bad news. "MeeCOOFF Eeks."

That's great! Now do "deus ex machina"! I'm genuinely curious.

Yeah, it's like sox or box or ox. How did you decide on VOOOOCHAY? Is X ever pronounced CHAY?

I'm not married to an Asian man, but I live with one, and love him, and bang him on the reg, because he's eminently fuckable. My gall levels are pretty high also. Who is Steve Harvey to talk, exactly?

Avocados are delicious. #TeamAvocado

I don't get this article's title. In the space of two and a half minutes, we see Emily Blunt's character gulping a martini, going to a liquor store, and clutching what looks like a mini-booze bottle in a bathroom while her voiceover talks about the fact that she's missing time. They've also gone out of their way to…

Also sexy: constantly fondling the breasts on your dagger hilts. Touching up inanimate objects is really attractive.

Nikolaj Coster-Waldau's face looks lived-in, but "three-month meth binge" seems like an exaggeration. Arguments about whether someone is hot or not are kind of pointless: Joe Manganiello does absolutely nothing for me, but I'm not expecting to have the definitive last word about it. (Except that HipsterDBag is wrong…

Made two accounts: one for $100 and another for $1. I fucking love Veronica Mars.

It's going to get AMAZING, Nathan Ford's Evil Twin. This is nothing. This is Farscape cracking its knuckles and warming up.

My vote is for leather pants Crichton. The t-shirt is all well and good, but the cargos are just OK. The leather pants were an astonishingly good choice.

It's silly and random and then takes a knife to your gut and twists. I can think of at least three episodes that made me cry. This show is magnificently weird and awesome in all the best ways.

I am so happy right now—been waiting for this thing to get recapped since forever. Crackers don't matter, indeed.

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Are you high right now? I enjoyed the fuck out of your comment, either way.

Are you high right now? I enjoyed the fuck out of your comment, either way.

What about CSI Miami? I wouldn't call it hate-watching, but that show is fun to watch largely because of how terrible it is. It's not anything people should get passionately vitriolic about, but it's dumb cheesy fun on a sick day.

What about CSI Miami? I wouldn't call it hate-watching, but that show is fun to watch largely because of how terrible it is. It's not anything people should get passionately vitriolic about, but it's dumb cheesy fun on a sick day.

As well as tensions on Depends.

As well as tensions on Depends.