I both laughed and hurled when I heard about the gritty Memphis blues tribute from Cyndi Lauper!

I've (of course) compared the length of a particularly extendo-"beef" to my penis. And hung my head in shame.

The Future of "Reality" TV

Maybe a trepanning session would help.

The Long Run is a horrible album that just happens to contain a sides-worth of brilliant songs. Corrosive yuppie-meets-The Deuce sleaze like 'Those Shoes, Teenage Jail, & Disco Strangler.' Constant playlist faves over here at Chez Guy.

Ahem…

Here's one! She's an ex-junkie who runs a halfway house for others like her. But since a mad dog murderer killed her Police Chief father back in the '90s, she fights crime, capitalizing on all the snitches at her disposal. 'Cuz she threatens them with kitchen chore duty if they don't spill and rewards them with…

How about this: She's the city's first Gypsy Lady Cop, but she's cursed with second sight. So she runs a fortune teller's business in her den. And that's how she catches criminals. Because they're stupid…

Star Whacker?

So you're implying that if he dies anytime soon, it won't be due to natural causes, even if that turns out to be the coroner's verdict?

Maybe he's taking Randy Quaid's place?

Don't forget Blacula—Dracula's Soul Brother!

I do play a shit-load of alt.country. That Bloodshot records stuff from the '90s sure do shred!

When I do a 'rural' set, I call it 'Hardcore Honky Tonk.' To alert punters to the no-Garth, no-Mandrell vibe.

I Wanna Be A Teenage Idol. Elton said it, not me…

"All right, Dr. Colossus, you're free to go, but stay away from Death Mountain."

Man, talk about unintentional salute to "Les Yeux Sans Visage." Maximum Creepy!

Let me guess:

Jules Dassin-One of my favorite directors that no one talks about…

These guys need to add a little GLAM to their ISLAM.