TASTE LIKE CRAB, TALK LIKE PEOPLE!

Can we go to Bloaty's Pizza Hog instead?

As someone who also once had Head Pigeons, I agree with you.

This warms my squeedlyspooch.

HOW ABOUT I DIRECT YOU TO WWEMATTITUDE.COM

MILKAMANIA IS RUNNIN' WILD!

Eh, I'm from St Louis and thus his, and by extension the entire site's, whole "St Louis is a disaster of a city that I would fully support being hit by a hydrogen bomb" mentality kinda turned me on him.

The past few months have provided ample opportunity to laugh at El Pres, though: all his jet-set, race-horse-owning, Trump-voting Masshole ways will be coming to a halt soon once Renee takes half. Plus, #cuckcycle (or as I preferred to call it, Portnoy's Complaint) was one of the best self-owns I've seen.

Eh, he's been phoning it in the past year or two, I think.

That was always The Awl's thing, but yeah, do better, AV Club.

Chapo Trap House had the return of Tim Heidecker as Alex Jones in an all-time classic open (seriously, if him and James Adomian don't do a Alex Jones-Off soon they're missing an open goal), plus a great new Chapo Reading Series.

SARAH KOENIG GO ON CUMTOWN

OTHER GOOD US HOCKEY PODCASTS: The one Lozo and Wysh do, Spittin' Chiclets (yes it's from Barstool but so's Pardon My Take, and La Stool's hockey coverage is actually legit good), and anything with Down Goes Brown.

Between that and the whole Thinx kerfuffle, it's as if female #disruptive capitalists are just as bad as male #disruptive capitalists. Hmmm, maybe there's some sort of common thread there…

MICK MOUSE!

That'd be quiche.

Now you're just making me remember Jocelyn's reaction to Boyz4Now breaking up on WSN.

Patrick Kane is a rapist shitheel, the Hawks are cheating scum helped out by a biased NHL, and their bandwagon fans can all go get into Lake Michigan.

Hop on a trolley and come down to the White House! I'll put you on the register, let's take a look at my physical paper calendar…Thursday next, pop on down to the White House, Mr. Trap House!

#1—Pick Flick! (Also, she looks better with brown hair, as Walk The Line proves.)
#4—HINGLE MCCRINGLEBERRY, PENN STATE UNIVERSITY.
#5—Not great, Bob!
#9—Hey, it's Amber "Cutthroat Bitch" Volakis!
#s 39 and 51 aren't going to start another Broadway Bro-Down, are they?