El perro, el perro, es mi corazón
El gato, el gato, el gato no es bueno
Cilantro es cantante, Cilantro es muy famoso
¡Cilantro es el hombre con el queso del diablo!

Oscar, I have some bad news for you. Your puppy has…cancer.

I grew up in a pretty unusual house. It was a ROUND-HOUSE! We were poor, so I had to make fruit juice from a mule. We called it DONKEY-PUNCH!

TURN ON MLB NETWORK RIGHT FUCKING NOW!

#1—only thing I remember about him is that he played Joel Stransky in Invictus because daddy gave him the role, and Stransky was too good a fly-half to be played by a nepotistic fuck
#4—killed a man!
#6—I'm so angry I could swear!
#7—His discounts are CRIMINAL.
#35—anyone remember "PopoZao?"

Ricky Spanish…

http://awfulannouncing.com/…

Other notable Ironman Heavymetalweight title winners: two blow-up sex dolls, multiple cuddly toys, a guy who won an online auction for the strap, a work of art, a bus, three different ladders, Vince McMahon's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and the entire crowd of a show in Providence where the title was being…

"My fi-ants left me."

#7—recently got into Twitter beefs with multiple people from Chapo Trap House (he thought Felix's style was CHUMP, yo) and Dan Le Batard, which are two people/things I like a lot
#15—She made a direct-to-video film whose name I forget that made many a child with the Disney Channel quite happy.
#25—Tom DuBois! Deputy S.…

Yeah, some of his political positions suck, but Lt. Dan's foundation did some good work for a policeman I know in my hometown that got shot and paralyzed on the job (by a white guy, mind, because this comment section is a bit tetchy about that sort of thing) by paying to make his house fully accessible.

SPOILER ALERT

I fully admit, I had Dianne's description of what she thinks Rentboy is as my Facebook "About Me" for a while in college. (This was long before Tinder, mind.)

You are correct, sir! Here it is on Findlaw: http://caselaw.findlaw.com/…

You say that Rents and Simon are going to troll the Orange Order/Huns supporters? COUNT THIS TIM IN!

#1—got dumped by Charlie for The Waitress
#3—Wash!
#4—Andrea Planbee on Newsradio
#5—got her start in Heaven's Gate
#22—lost a lawsuit to a hockey player I know

Beret of poodle, on my noodle it shall rest
Try my red robin suit, it comes one breast or two
See my vest, see my vest, see my vest!

I said it before on this site: AV Club's TV show will be worse than Barstool Sports' TV show, not necessarily because of content but because the latter was a) pulling ratings, 2) on a network people actually get, and III) had PFTCommenter.

Tony Amonte.

This is the right place for me to say that I own a copy of Cyrus Tompkins' album "I'm Being Unfaithful To My Wife, Alice Tompkins. You Heard Me, Alice Tompkins."