It's basically happening in real life right now. Just watch that.

If I saw her at the gym in her sexiest workout skort, I'd think "Not bad, mama. Not bad."

This sounds a B-plot from a Seinfeld episode. I mean, I know it wasn't, but it sounds like one.

Damn, late to the clam bake again. They're probably cold now.

Excitable Misunderstood Trainee? Bad news, I think your boss hangs out here. Better cheese it!

Its pronounced "clam bake".

I just hope you're something non-important, like a teacher or air traffic controller or something.

Now I'm hoping the show's intro is basically The Six Million Dollar Man…doctors inserting his social awareness chip, maybe a cool sound effect whenever he flexes his superhuman compassion…

American Dad! also had an episode with a Michael Moore sex scene. This is something I did not know the world was clamoring for.

At least they left during the first trimester. It's those late-term walkouts that really upset me.

There are strategic reserves stored in abandoned copper mines in the Dakotas.

Remember when people made hand-crafted cocktails from recipes they saw advertised on websites? What a bunch of tools.

You're burying the lede here, bro: Russell Crowe is friends with RZA?

Well if got yanked while on stage, he'd lose his liquor license.

I just want you to know that Im upvoting you mostly for your use of landing on a comet as as an easily recognized watershed moment.

"Hey Melania, did you delete 'Toddlers & Tiaras' off the DVR? Again?"

I don't know much in this world, but I do know I am not cool enough to own that console.

Some of the reindeer are, though. And no, not Prancer. Grow up, people.

Supper Club may be the newest child in this now Mormon-sized family we call the AVClub, but we love him just as much as his brothers & sisters. So, yes, he gets his own room. Gameological and Great Job, Internet! are getting bunk beds and might have to share for a while.

Because he said formally instead of formerly?