I see Lenny has more dialogue than Carl. I guess because we didn't end racism until 2008.

Canada is no longer the Shomi State.

White Zombie>>Rob Zombie solo

"Lola" is terrifically fun to sing at karaoke. That's all I know in this mixed up, muddled up, shook up world.

I believe this year was the 98th PGA, so by my count you are…too old to be on the internet this late. Do you want me to call your home health aide so she can put Matlock on?

On the plus side, he caddied once for the Dalai Lama so I think he received total consciousness just before he died. Which is nice.

You probably don't remember, but washboards were really popular then and had a huge influence on all the arts.

The Browns did give up a blocked-extra-point-returned-for-a-score (worth 2 points, btw) last week. It was very much a crucial factor in their loss. If there's a way to lose, the Browns will find it.

Gotta pay the bills somehow. You think those Great Job, Internets just write themselves?

People's a tough role. He could maybe pull off Belichick if you put him in some old man make up and a hoodie. Maybe give him a few tranquilizers, too.

I figured this was gonna be a People vs. Tom Brady movie announcement, but I guess Wahlberg is just too short.

They're not all that sobering, either.
*finishes drink; leers at Jay S.*

But I am right that Boxing Day is a holy day of obligation in the Canadian religion, right?

Shoulda gone with Beta over VHS. Then it would be bigger for sure.

Didn't he just join the board of Reynolds Tobacco? That's pretty much a lateral move.

Corey Kluber would like you to know he's just fine, thanks.

Now how will I commemorate reconciling with my new former-KGB neighbor?

He has a mustache that makes people think he knows a lot about football.

I was going to point out the ridiculousness of setting this in a National League town, where she'll have to hit. But then I thought of actual MLB pitchers trying to hit and I just laughed at them instead. I hope there's a long, thrilling montage of her practicing to bunt.

I have eight different movies whose titles end with "…Gone Wild". Number six will shock you!