OH FUCK
OH SHIT IT'S THE CRIMSON KING GET YOUR SIXGUNS EVERYBODY

Pun forgiven.

Hatchetcane is correct.

I'm an educated man, and I still thought this headline might contain more than one made up word.

But, Haysoos, Amazing Racing IS a televised sport of sorts.

Train the Skywalker boy, Lincoln will.

And Starz reaches the long-awaited punchline to his existence.

"Coming up next on Behind the Music, Oscar the Grouch's relationship with Will.I.Am begins putting stress on the group. With the '05 Japan tour on the horizon, will they be able to keep it together?"

I'm with you, Mr. Monster. Jay-Z and Beyonce > Black-Eyed Peas, both in general and for Super Bowl spectacle purposes.

They saw Bristol Palin grinding with dudes on Dancing With the Stars and figured that "Real America" is okay with the sexxxy dancing now.

(By which I mean 10 O'Clock people is also awesome, not that he's written it since Dark Tower ended.)

Oh, man! "N" is fucking AWESOME. Everyone get your hands on "N"… probably the best thing he's written since Dark Tower ended.

Best atypical King are the four novellas in Different Seasons… they're atypical for different reasons, but they're all kind of off his usual M.O. and they're all excellent, Shawshank especially.

Desperation is awesome because it's more Lovecraftian than King normally seems comfortable with. The Regulators is the same way… those books are some bleak and creepy shit.

Read "The Stand," Cliffy. I've yet to meet someone who doesn't at least really like it.

Wizard and Glass is the best book in the series, in my opinion. I can see why people dislike it so much for breaking up the flow of the "main" story, but for whatever reason the Western-meets-Camelot setting really resonated with me, and I think Jonas is one of King's best, most complicated villains. It also keeps…

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EVERYONE
BE CAREFUL! He's on to us!

Why should we listen to you? You're a Donkey-Raping shit eater!

It's because Disney took over. They finished the ambitious, typically awesome PIXAR stuff in the pipeline—Wall-E and Up— and now they're gonna milk the cash cow for a while.