There's also a pretty strong tendency among Latin Americans to see everything that happens there, especially every bad thing, as the fault of the CIA. Which is how the Chavistas manage to hold on to power in Venezuela, for example. They're anti-Democratic and incompetent, but they have 200 years of resentment they can…

Now Chester Arthur, that guy knew how to dress.

If Grant hadn't appointed so many crooked and incompetent cronies to high positions he'd be much more well-regarded today. Maybe he would have even gotten a third term. Who knows what would have happened? No Jim Crow? Maybe even a South that is racially progressive and doesn't burn with resentment? Too bad we can…

Anybody who bitches about how the two parties are more or less the same and there's nobody worth voting for should take a look at the Gilded Age. It's amazing how much the parties just sucked. And yet voter turnout was insanely high then.

I used to know a Chilean named Jerry Brown. No relation to the governor of California. (And anyway, his name is really Edmund, after his father, Pat.)

Patricio Lynch?

I assume you're going for the World Cup? Did you manage to get any tickets? I have a co-worker who's going and every game in Rio sold out instantly, so he has to spend his big World Cup trip watching the games on TV. In Portuguese.

So, maybe I'm not an expert because I'm not attracted to men, but isn't Benedict Cumberbatch kind of, you know, weird looking? I don't really get it.

Is it OK if I skip the weed?

When I saw Pearls the other day, I thought the art might be by Bill Watterson. But I figured it was more likely just a Watterson tribute. It was nice to see, either way.

In the same way that Christian Science is.

I would have said White Man in Hammersmith Palais and Guns of Brixton, but yeah, that's pretty close.

The AV Club:
Laughing and masturbating.

Oh, I know how big twelve inches is.

You know what always drove me crazy? The people who couldn't understand that the size of the pizza wasn't necessarily related to the number of slices in it. "How many slices in your medium?" "Eight." "How many in the large?" "Eight." "But..but…wait, what?" I mean they were genuinely baffled. Maybe they think the size…

I worked at a pizza place when I was 19, and our phone number was one digit off from a Holiday Inn all the way across the country. We clearly identified ourselves as a pizza place every time we answered the phone, but they'd still always say, "Room 1232," (and usually in a pretty rude tone at that). So we'd put them…

I'm sure there are other ways you can connect all three of those things.

He's too sore to sit down at the moment.

I think it's condemned somewhere in Leviticus.

The first season is on Hulu Plus.