If I were British I'd send old pruneface to the Tower and declare this meteorological minx queen of all the land.

I'll be in my Fortress of Solitude.

Good question and one I have no answer for. He'd have to be young enough to play character at the beginning of his story, and be convincingly intelligent, creepy and charming. So young Malcolm McDowell I guess.

I love these books and they could make a terrific TV series.

It's not so much the yelling as it is the shrillness.

Find yourself some nice dresses. Get yourself some shoes. Find
somewhere you could get a facial. And hire a decorator to come here quick because, damn!

Well they say women shouldn't be
the president
Cause we go crazy from time to time
Well push my button baby here I come
Yeah look out baby
I'm at high tide

I have the sexual prowess of a teenager and the mature sagacity of middle age.

There's already remedies for that. You get a warning now if somebody on your account is getting near their data limit and you can shut down their data access.

I thought TayTweets had been shut down.

Let 'em do it the old fashioned way. In my day we used our imaginations to conjure images of the young Widow Johnson's shapely ankle and the results whitewashed the inside of the privy.

OK, not a legs quote but I'll use any excuse to reference this gem from Raymond Chandler:

They sit on your face and suffocate you like a cat!

He's gonna need to shoot a load of bunk.

That guy owes me money!

What's yellow and inexplicably keeps getting work?

Lake Bell? That ding-a-ling broad is all wet.

I am swamped at work today so I'm just going to repost what I wrote on the AVC After Dark book thread:

Shameful upvote.

Maybe they'll add a cranky minister who outlaws dancing in the resort town.