Give me five bees for a quarter.

It would be pretty difficult to break any current records held by ElDan's mom.

I'm just trying to figure out how to keep a Cleveland steamer fresh during shipment.

The Bourne Identity Crisis.

I'm pining for the days of Pants Off Dance Off.

Do you have a can of beer? Bottled beer makes me burp!

There's nothing like a great dick punch.

To much love can make you thor, actually.

I'd like to go to an amusement park where I can hunt teenagers. Or even just on my lawn.

No, I meant POV porn filmed by the grim reaper.

Business is about reduction of risk. Copying success is the easiest way to reduce risk.

You can sit back down now, kids.

There was a print edition?!?

They've shot several rich people into space. This is hardly a first.

That's supposed to imply that there's a naked woman floating around somewhere up there.

Some times my asteroids strike so bad I can't even sit down.

And you'll be the first to contract Soyuz CancerAIDS.

I was listening to a Sex Pistols bootleg in the living room without realizing that the remote speakers were playing in the kitchen where my mom was making dinner. I walked in the kitchen while they were playing 'No Fun' and my mom asked "What's this, the masturbaters anthem?!?"

I saw an interview with Moe late in his life where he was appalled that The Three Stooges was being aired for children on TV.

Freaks Of the Industry is a highly underrated song.