Regular feature analyzing fast food DJs please.

Maybe she wants us to see the violence inherent in the system.

Aspergers? More like asportsbra.

No, with Ted Levine shepherding an infuriatingly quirky detective it's more like a dramatic take on Monk set in El Paso/Juarez.

After he puts the lotion on his skin?

"If you choose to cancel the apocalypse instead of attending our daughter's school play, well, you may have saved the planet but this marriage is doomed!"

Are you pumped like a great big fat person?

@avclub-14e4cee178d88fb9aa346dbcc11f2873:disqus You know who he is. He's that guy, has male pattern baldness, leather jacket, wears waaaaaay too much Drakkar Noir. He's that guy. You know the one.

Some talk about family values, at least one heist, a globe-spanning conspiracy, a post-credits David Statham cameo, and The Rock shooting a snack machine.

But he looks sixteen!

First the Chinese poison my Coke, now this. Worst 4th ever.

Me: Hey, are you going to the barbecue?

That's just, like, your opinion, man.

I'm pretty sure Crash's biography is a violently racist sexual fantasy.

Butler Hardly Knew Her

I think it's for people who can afford vodka or something to mix it with but not both. Actually I think it's for people too stupid to know how to make a screwdriver. Possibly Snooki's offspring.

It's their fault for only offering "Franco. Franco. Franco."

Hodor.

Gooble gobble gooble gobble we accept you we accept you…

Or a really big dog?