Well, I'm a man, so Oscars don't mean a thing to me. I like movies with GUNS and EXPLOSIONS and TITTIES and MEGAN FOX GIMME MEGAN FOX SHE'S HOT I LIKE LOOKING AT HER BECAUSE I AM MALE.

I can see it now
G-Men busting down doors, smashing iPods with sledgehammers, while sneering criminals in 3-piece suits try and flush their wares down cyber-sinks.

Actually, that might be the best con out there. That is the very first thing ABC would think about.

Jaden Smith's star is rising so fast
he's already getting backlash for backlash. He'll have two rehab stretches, a Golden Globe, a Razzie, an Oscar nod, and an unsucessful marriage before he's able to drive.

Holy Shit, Flaming Lips
Is "Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots" seriously 8 years old?? Jesus. I mean fucking Jesus.

You've finally made a monkey out of me!

One thing to say to all the Summer '10 haters:

My texts
allow for 160 characters. It's Twitter that only allows for 140. That's 20 wasted characters.

Did Fox News interview the fake Megan Fox
or the 23 models and actresses composited to create Megan Fox?

Is it just me, or is Andy Rooney just overpaid? I understand that he serves a purpose and is an icon, but has America outlived him? My opinion is "yes." Mr. Rooney, you should just, as the man says, "quit while you are ahead."

I cannot even imagine how that would be. I can't see enjoying it, in all honesty. The show alternates between moving gratingly fast and maddeningly slow, which I'd say would create an uncomfortable mixture of confusion and boredom.

I believe you to be right. It brought joy to my heart when I walked into the Barnes and Noble music section and saw FIVE unique "Glee" releases. My stars, I could have sworn there were only two!

WORK DRUGS.

Raises questions as to what he's staring at intensely.

Let's talk "exhibitionist subtext"
What's in his left hand?

Eastwood, DiCaprio, Dustin Lance Black. That's a helluva damn line-up.

I misread that headline
as "…lowers minimum WAGE requirement." I think the social commentary in that story would eclipse that of American Idol toe-chaining themselves to the Bieberwagen.

To be fair
If she's putting acting aside, because she's sick of the CW-reject roles that get written for her, more power to her, I guess.

I used to be right there with you (especially since she and I are the same age), but have you seen her lately??

OH MY GOD
That Newcastle guy just walked across my screen TWICE on one page. If that ad does not go away soon, I will be going "Killer Inside Me" all over that deeply mediocre ale. Except I won't be apologizing while I do it.