YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE WOOF!

I know I should not read Youtube comments, but good god, the comments on that "10 hours of sexual harrassment in NYC" are disturbing. One guy even compares feminism to to genocide because it is making men and women afraid of each other. Thus, they are afraid to mate, become gay, and the whole world's population dies…

That was totally worth my time.

Yeah, well, hope you like being right all the time, jerk!

The Cheat as Spaceman Spiff and the KoT as that fuckin' scary thing from Pan's Labyrinth are my favorites.

Who are you and what have you done with ElDan?!

This Ghostbusters remix is definitely not as good as you remember it being. You're just viewing it through nostalgia-colored glasses.

Starring Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen.

It is also Lindsay Lohan's middle name.

There's very little meat in these gym mats.

So actual chickens, then, is what you're saying?

KDC: Kentucky DAWES Chicken

Is that a euphemism?

How is Mohd not the first commenter on this article? It's about tentacles, for god's sake!

The Judean People's Gunt.

Her?

No, you've almost got it right, though. Hot Pockets are sweatpants. Literally. They are made from the discarded sweatpants of fat people.

37? That number seems a bit low to me.

I work in a large open office, and these damn Nerf guns have come into vogue with people all across the floor. For the longest time, I used to be the angry old man that would curse the unprofessional kids, pick up the stray Nerf darts off of the floor, and throw them away. But then one day I saw an ad on Amazon for…

Not that there's anything wrong with that.