That's not true. Everyone here is mentally ill and we have committed no violent crimes (as far as I know). Now let's have that national conversation.

It continues to boggle me that Jackson would turn a relatively small children's book into a 9-hour behemoth. It's the equivalent of turning one-half of The Fellowship of the Ring into a 9-hour movie. I'll still watch it though and maybe go get some nachos at the lobby when they have their little Council at Rivendell,…

It continues to boggle me that Jackson would turn a relatively small children's book into a 9-hour behemoth. It's the equivalent of turning one-half of The Fellowship of the Ring into a 9-hour movie. I'll still watch it though and maybe go get some nachos at the lobby when they have their little Council at Rivendell,…

A crazy person was just arrested in Indiana for threatening to shoot up a school. He had a cache of 47 guns. It's becoming really hard for me to take these pro-gun people seriously. What kind of person has 47 guns? Even 5 guns is more than enough. If you want to blow shit up join the military.

A crazy person was just arrested in Indiana for threatening to shoot up a school. He had a cache of 47 guns. It's becoming really hard for me to take these pro-gun people seriously. What kind of person has 47 guns? Even 5 guns is more than enough. If you want to blow shit up join the military.

If only Adam Lanza had been allowed to pray in a public school, this tragedy would not have happened. God bless you, Mike Huckabee, for shining a light on the true cause of these mindless slaughters. And Tarantino.

If only Adam Lanza had been allowed to pray in a public school, this tragedy would not have happened. God bless you, Mike Huckabee, for shining a light on the true cause of these mindless slaughters. And Tarantino.

And my favorite, "The One Where Douchey Armenian Guy Gets His Dick Bitten Off By Old Maid Who Appears Young Only to Males."

And my favorite, "The One Where Douchey Armenian Guy Gets His Dick Bitten Off By Old Maid Who Appears Young Only to Males."

Watch out for those macaques in Gibraltar. I hear they like to snatch tourists' bags.

Watch out for those macaques in Gibraltar. I hear they like to snatch tourists' bags.

So where in the book does the movie end? At 169 minutes, that leaves Jackson plenty of time to defeat Smaug and show Bilbo's return to The Shire to smoke some Leaf. Right? What! No?

So where in the book does the movie end? At 169 minutes, that leaves Jackson plenty of time to defeat Smaug and show Bilbo's return to The Shire to smoke some Leaf. Right? What! No?

The Goblin King and the Two Blutos

The Goblin King and the Two Blutos

Though not as deep as Ally Sheedy's "When you grow up, your heart dies."

Though not as deep as Ally Sheedy's "When you grow up, your heart dies."

Wang Computers.

Wang Computers.

You Americans and your "due process" and "fair trials."