Wait, so…
Does he or doesn't he use deodorant?

Shotgun Willie…
That whole album is flawless, start to finish. From Bubbles In My Beer to Whiskey River to Devil In A Sleeping Bag, that album does not dissapoint.

What about Murray's tour…
of outdoor concert venues and band shells? When will they make that announcement?

Did Steve tell you that, per chance?

Fuck retro anything. Fuck your tattoos. Fuck all you junkies and fuck your short memories. Fuck smiley gladhands with hidden agendas. Fuck these dysfunctional, insecure actresses.

Billy Joe Shaver
is an awesome songwriter. One of the best, honest, most original voices that no one has ever heard. Meatwad gets serious props for the Honky Tonk Heroes mention.

Lobsters and shit. I licked that shit. Then I slapped that shit off my table. That shit was good.

oh God, it's real…
In 2006 I was given the unfortunate task of writing coverage on a draft of this script while it was in development at Gold Circle Films. What a horrible piece of shit that script was. I can't believe it actually got greenlit. I guess they didn't read my coverage, because I passed on that…

I can't wait to see her romantic comedy…
about the transsexual that goes on a blind date with a an AWOL soldier! It's going to be HILARIOUS!

Any reason will do.

I'm just going to say it…
I hope they all die in a horrible car accident. There. I said it.

Alan Jackson…
…also the poor man's Alan Jackson.

channeling Dignan…
I'm not always as confident as I look.

Who says that, really? What kind of computer are you running, a Commodore 64?

PFO doesn't fuck around with Waiting For Guffman references!

I have just one question for you…
WHO'S ON TOP AND WHO'S ON BOTTOM NOW?!

The 'tab' line doesn't really bother me…
I just can't figure out why on the poster he's wearing eyeliner and laying on a stack of fucking pancakes (and seemingly OK with it). Can someone please pick Steve up off the pancakes?

"They made sequels to all my movies…
…to be honest with you."

Kilos…
I'm so glad he's back down to 82 kilos from 92 kilos. He was just too fucking ripped at 92 kilos… Hey I wonder how many fucking kilos I am…

I was not trying to be facile (does that mean my pee pee is going soft?), I was merely referencing what I thought was a very funny Onion magazine cover. You can view it here:
http://www.theonion.com/con… So… suck on that, Halpert.