*jumps back through window, adjusts tie, sits down*

Watch out Cathartic Bullets! He's Irish!

I would watch the shit out of an animated 30 Rock

742 years from now, Crash will still be the biggest Best Picture mistake of all time, because the Oscar voters didn't have the stones to pick Brokeback Mountain. Plus, it was a fucking awful film.

Only sometimes? I hope Ghost Carson is haunting the shit out of Jay Leno every night for turning the Tonight Show into unfunny middlebrow crap. Not that Carson was cutting edge, but he proved you can be appeal to a mass audience AND be funny enough to influence all sorts of comedians, from Carlin to Pryor, from Murphy…

(punches Pepsi Jr in arm) That's for wasting teacher's valuable time!

…as they pray in their phoney-baloney church……or synagogue?!?

Then drove it off the cliff. And then shot it.

Yo dawg, you really made that comment your own, dawg. I'm feelin' it.

There weren't any Flavor Flav photos in public domain.

Too late. We all had to put up with Caveman Johnny Damon anyway.

You've been waiting for A Moment Like This to tell us that, haven't you?

CORRECT!
What musical instrument would be referred to as a "squeeze box"?

At the very least, better than Edward Cullen hosting Blockbusters.

Those are his real feet, sadly. He was lucky to be able to land the Big Bird gig, since you just can't find steel-toed boots in that size.

I might have been the only nine year old who wanted to live at Cheers. My parents did a good job there.

Twlight, starring the Count as Edward Cullen, would have been a marked improvement.

M.A.C. and R.I.P.D. and Me

And most real. Up there with Cronkite covering JFK's death, just as important to their particular viewers.

Sesame Street would have been a lot worse if it had been set in Erie, PA in the 1970's