And the Weezer surprised me. OK Go was one of the weaker bits.

If we could just add a couple years to the life expectancy every year, we'd never reach middle age.

The new term is "half-way to death."

I'm actually from the 60s, and smell a little bit like cabbage.

Nailed it (or, whatever one says when they agree with things these days)
It was great in early going when it kept foreshadowing all the awesome things that were to come in the roboragnapocalypse. Then, as those things came to pass, they didn't have the heft that was promised. At the end, I felt the whole book was a…

If he tried a little harder…
…he could've worked in a couple more references to how he went to Yale.

He's not William Shatner?

Fuck Brie, Marry Caplan, and kill anyone who tries to stop me.

I was 10 when I saw the original on TV, and it is on record as the scariest experience of my live.

There's a clip of Mirman reading his letter at WNYC, and he reads the "Fuck" out loud. So you could be quoting his reading of his letter.

Womp womp

But, what if I'm about to die in 30 minutes and I can only do one of the following:
1) watch Louie
2) eat lots of cheese
3) watch Party Down
4) tell my wife I love her

Dexter.

Yeah - just look at my hands.

It's OK if it doesn't involve time-travel.

Well, 'quaint' is an old word for (and etymologically related to) 'cunt.' Hopefully she understood that.

When your only tool is a hammer, all the world's problems look like vaginas.

Many things in my masturbatorium are masturbatory. It's kind of a rule.

It needed to be about a minute longer.
I was almost there.

Is it…