Did Scientology make Kirste Alley fat
or did she join Scientology because she was fat?

Tina Fey
I'd hit it.

Summer Glau and Jewel Staite
I'd hit it.

Once again, I hate Jared Leto
because he stole Claire Danes from me.

Good God
Two things:
1. Is the most exciting thing in Jay Leno's life really buying a desk?
2. How does Jay Leno not know the lineup to his first show?

People in these movies tend to
have a serious deficiency in cognitive reasoning. "Hey, this kid with cancer keeps writing letters to God. What am I supposed to do with them?" "You should devote your day to getting God to deal with it." Because that's what you're getting paid to do, mailguy.

Wilford Brimley is the pinnacle of human dignity, good sir.

The Pop n Lock method
Burn that fat and dignity away, the Tracy Anderson way.

Is Robot Fergie
still Fergielicious? Just one more reason to hate singing robots.

When I first heard
that he died, I immediately thought of Dogma. What a BAMF.

When Eddie Murphy's Giant Head Speaks
You will listen. Specifically, to the sound of America's entertainment industry weeping.

yes you can. The motorcycle's a must have.

The Indiana Jones
Mid-Life Crisis Gift Shop!

Somewhere, far away
Dave Chapelle is crying.

Fruit Vodka?
ew.

Or perhaps the DT's.

Fergie's obvious epilepsy
Is no laughing matter.

Dear John Mayer's penis,
Either get John Mayer to do another "Try" blues rock album, or stop forcing me to read about you.

I am already convulsing in laughter
just thinking about how they would possibly go about making The Horse and His Boy.

Also, CBS just finished yanking all evidence of this wonderous event from youtube.