Dude, it's spelled John Mayer.  And yes, he thinks Asian women's bodies are wonderlands.

I'm confused.  So what you're saying is the murderer was the District Attorney the whole time?

That could be Showtime's new tentpole!

I've never met a real-life reaper.  Hell, I've never met a sewer either.  It's like I've been purposefully left out of that whole dynamic.

Lohan fans?

I wouldn't even drink a Pepsi with Bea Arthur's dick!

Sexual cloning?

Sexual cloning?

At least not from the AV Club.

Dark wings, dark eyebrows.

Be still Joey Lawrence's heart!

She's also starring as the title character in "She-Tick."

Honest to God, it took me about three seconds to remember who or what a Topher Grace is.  That's a victory in my book.

Ah, the role that killed French Stewart.

'Twas the summer of '02, and I ventured out to the grocer in search of foodstuffs.  I returned with frozen fish fillets filled with cheese.  Several months later, a strange woman that nobody seemed to know cooked them up in the middle of the night.

You cynical bastard.  Now there's one less uncorrupted soul in the omniverse.

I'll always remember the moment when the green Power Ranger turned into the white Power Ranger.  Talk about a moment!

The whole time I was watching The Dark Knight Rises, I just kept thinking to myself how much Batman reminds me of Moses.  Today I feel vindicated.

Ryan Reynolds wanted to turn down the always-on-Comedy-Central classic "Waiting," but he didn't want to disappoint Dane Cook and Luis Guzman.

Michael Clarke Duncan's ghost hasn't been hunted yet.