Chipotle police
Arrest this man

At least this will free up her schedule to begin shooting the new SyFy original movie Bettywhitenado.

Why are these old ladies eating cake on the toilet while being peed on?

Remember when those juggalos threw a watermelon at Betty White?  Man, somebody's gotta do something about those juggalos.

I heard it on the news today
What happened when those sharks all fell out of the sky
And you died
And it hurts like a mouth full of sharks
A mouth full of sharks ain't no fun

Now you got me thinking about the legacy of a shark that kills itself while masturbating.

Shark on a Hot Tin Roof

Michael Clarke Duncan as High Five Ghost.

Binging on Johnny Depp is the new binging on Rowan Atkinson.

I don't even own a book.

Is this Matt Damon?

Somebody told me this movie was about zombies running around Laurel Canyon.  The original title was "Dawes of the Dead."

Then again, you totally might not.

This very request has turned me into a middleman.  The circle is now complete!

Paul Rodriguez makes Carlos Mencia look like Malcolm X.

Do you have a problem with middlemen?  Why are you always try to cut out the middlemen?  Let's try and be a little more tolerant of the middlemen.

I will also accept a promotional turtle in the shape of a hat.

Those suckers in the Czech Republic have only ever had hats with 60% purity.  I checked it out.

Instead of this imaginary "Christopher" character you've dreamed up, maybe the question could have involved real-life rap superstars Tech N9ne and Mack 10.

More like Cash Money Hundredaires.