I'm in my PJs and drinking coffee and eating lox and looking out the window at the grey clouds roll across the almost finished freedom tower waiting for the snow and listening to Jon Brion and wondering what year I'll die and will any of us still be on here avclubbin then?

That's not really all that bad considering the last 2k I spent went mostly to pepperoni and then cottage cheese and then ham and then back to bourbon. It made me all a little sad which made me cry which made me shorter, so I spent the last 200 on a pair of platform shoes and my makeup ran and dripped down my face so…

In the past week I've been to:

LOL Amelie finally paid a co-worker to come in here and talk about the 'article'

FIRST CRUSH THREAD

Hey Mother, pour the wine
Me dragons party starts at nine
What rags shall I wear to ye local pub
The prix fixe of slop give me Briyan a chub

Potatoes in my pants lickin salsa off the toilet
Babies made of play-doh sippin gimlets in the closet
Don Quixote took a trip and went around in circles
Brian got some tapered shorts dressin like hes Erkel

The same thing happened to me when I wuz sittin in the theater on my 53rd goober, 23rd Ike, 7th watermelon Joggy Rancher (limited 2008 special olympics batch), 4th orange soda and vanilla stoli and all of a sudden after a mere 114 minutes Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins just up and credits roll, HELLLO we were just…

Hi mbs!

It's about an anorexic gluten free Jewish teenage girl running from the Mafia for stealing Giovanni Ribisis career and hiding it in a Hezbollah safehouse on her trip to Turkey she took on Thanksgiving simply for the lolzies.

I have a feeling I'm about to go the way of Ellio's, only with less microwaving and more just takin right outta the freezer and finishing this comment while a tomato sauce slushie drips down my chin!

Yeah well I ate a lot of lobsters and burritos that year so my legs were really strong!

Yeah well I ate a lot of lobsters and burritos that year so my legs were really strong!

Your monitor is using precious energy I could be using to turn on my freezer to make bourbon infused glass of ice cubes. Shut it down tater tits!

Your monitor is using precious energy I could be using to turn on my freezer to make bourbon infused glass of ice cubes. Shut it down tater tits!

One time in collage I wuz rollerskatin back to my dorm with 3 crave sacks and some cheddar bay biscuits and I hit a pebble and flew right over some dreadful hippies head and my helmet went right thru his drum and the whole circle stopped and looked at me except and rubbed their eyes and took of their Lennon glasses…

One time in collage I wuz rollerskatin back to my dorm with 3 crave sacks and some cheddar bay biscuits and I hit a pebble and flew right over some dreadful hippies head and my helmet went right thru his drum and the whole circle stopped and looked at me except and rubbed their eyes and took of their Lennon glasses…

More like Pacbook Mo (a computer that has pacman and more data than the usual comp. And a book thing, like the Kindle).

More Like Bi-Curious-O-Lson-Twins-With Arnold-McRib-Am I doing it ri…

Ok come on. Paradox used the word 'arc' and I'm supposed to believe Julius Pepperwood is some dude sitting on a laptop in a pair of boxers drinkin a Corona and not an actual piece of wood thatz been nicely seasoned and dressed up in boxers and the beer put on top of it but then Scott Van Doki put the beer next to the…