Thankfully, Guy #2 has a full slate:

The Reflux!
is a lonely bile,
it's waiting in your mouuuuth.

Iggy Pop's brother Steve Pop doesn't get to do anything he wants to do.

I can't tell if that typo is supposed to be shut or shit your mouth.

It was the wurst of times.

Moderator, please change my username to Weaponized Von Trier.
TIA

Protip: Doles have faster read/write times than Chiquitas.

It's the only way they could think of to get people to pay top dollar to see a movie in the theater that they have already seen a gorillion times at home.

Agreed. You can close your eyes or plug your ears, but you can't turn off your nose unless you are a dead person. And why would anyone suffer through this aberration after they've already died once?

You're saying things I just can't fathom.

Weight loss tip: Setting yourself on fire is a proven method of losing unsightly bulges. Flick that Bic and watch the pounds melt away, just remember to use plenty of accelerant.

That is some serious eyebrow action, Smacky.

*The haunting Torgo's Theme plays softly in the distance*

That joke was kind of milquetoast.

I agree with everyone in this thread except me.

Psycho.

@avclub-de4a08d644135b09bd7e1a592dff156b:disqus seems to have a problem with his garrotted artery.

Me too! Room temperature plain yogurt is my favorite.

I've always wanted to be a coroner so that in my autopsy paperwork under "cause of death" I could write "victim was killed to death".

All Neko had to do for an A was to raid her grandfather's wardrobe and pick up a tambourine or a washboard.