Definitely getting a bit of a Padma Lakshmi vibe from her lately.

The last one. I sent them a seamless resume to get Tobias's position, and they sent me back some poppycock letter that cited my enjoyment of John Lennon's "Imagine" as grounds for rejection, so the job went to that Dowd bloke. Apparently a bloody Booker Prize doesn't mean anything on today's pop culture websites.

Well, that's all the time we have, folks. Good night!

Yes, well, guess what you don't know?

That's how I plan on ending my career, actually.

Mr. Definitely and I may not see eye-to-eye, but it was fucking difficult to out-talk Hitch, so cheers to him for that.

Me too, obviously

Why thank you, @avclub-e2b2ad10a0cce81f7b1757538471f089:disqus !

Martin's just like that sometimes. Hitchens and I used to egg his house and put cherry bombs in his mailbox when it got really annoying.

Well, before year's end I'll have Joseph Anton: The A.V. Club Edition released, and I imagine you blokes will have different lists.  Basically I just replace all instances of "Ayatollah" with "Chris Brown."

Oh, that would be lovely. We could be fatwa mates!

Do you mean it? I've got so many that didn't make it into Joseph Anton: A Memoir.

"Well, uh, what do you people, uh, like?"

God, these new gimmicks are such bollocks.

What? Oh dear, that is tragic. I fucking love The 36th Chamber of Shaolin. Well, obits always take awhile, they'll have it up soon enough.

We've got a real Christopher Hitchens on our hands, ladies and gentlemen!

God, this guy is such a wanker.

This sort of thing is pretty typical, really. I mean I was convinced I wrote Can't Hardly Wait, until Kurt Vonnegut told me it was "only in my mind." Let's cut this M. Night bloke some slack.

Yes, but it's not all bad. I've been "hiding" in Christopher Hitchens' flat for some time now, mostly just stealing his booze. And I'm getting better at ping pong!

Me too, Varmints. Me too.