The only reasons those movies are worthwhile:

You mean Teen Wolf is a stupid movie with mixed messages, terrible make-up, and is only worthwhole for the scenes with Jay Tarses and Scott Paulin?

I heard a horrible one a few days ago:

That's funny. I've never seen garbage eat garbage before.

Did you see her in Fame and Supergirl as well? I was a bit too young to have a crush on her but after seeing those films, I thought she was pretty cute.

Disqus is screwy so I often cannot upvote things, but I would upvote this.

They had a lot of cans of beans on sale at my grocery store yesterday…50 cents each. I bought some black beans, refried beans, and dark red kidney beans.

Her name is Megan, for God's sake. "Meaghan" doesn't prove you are super-creative, and it doesn't pay tribute to your Celtic roots…it just makes her look like her parents are high school dropouts.

I win! I always win. Is there no one on this planet to even challenge me?

You don't piss on hospitality.

We're too busy assuring middle-aged women that younger men are totally turned on by women "with experience."

DON'T CRACK WISE WITH ME, PORCUPINE!

Just to let you know, there are a lot of hot Russian broads out there. Polish broads, too.

And I did it without mentioning…well, a certain "special someone" who dresses from the era.

Thank you for not writing "Rain".

My early high school style was based on Leo DiCaprio in This Boy's Life and Kiefer Sutherland in Stand by Me.

"You think about this, Carl…when you get old, these kids…when I get old, they're gonna be
running the country. Now this is the thought that wakes me up in the middle of the night: that
when I get older, these kids are gonna take care of me."

I liked the one where they covered Ernest Goes to Jail and June said she found the bad Ernest kind of sexy.

You can say whatever you want about Grease 2 being better because it's politically correct and it's about two men fighting over a woman, but both movies suck. They're fucking awful and that's coming from someone who loves the '50s.

'CAUSE I DON'T MAKE MONKEYS, I JUST TRAIN 'EM!