You'd probably be the one with the big mouth yelling "Get him a body bag! Yeahhhhh!"

What If They Made a Format Switch and Nobody Came?

Did you also eat only vanilla ice cream?

Excuse me, I have to go home and put some water in catgun's momma's dish.

I'm still uncertain what will happen. I remember when people went nuts over Disqus. Can't people just register their old names with the new service?

Sure it wasn't a wish sandwich?

Stop wasting our time and let me get my dipped cone or I'll make you eat that fucking bag.

I just hope whatever happens to me happens to you worse.

You might like this essay by Bret Easton Ellis on why he didn't like Moonlight.

My friend, don't be a jerk.

I think you're thinking of Calvin & Hobbes…I don't recall Bloom County making that joke.

Now that he's done with his political campaigning, he could become a sit-down comic.

And we want some motherfucking brothers on that motherfucking Wall of Fame!

I'd give up "I Believe I Can Fly" even if he went back in time and killed Hitler.

"My daddy used to spank my bare bottom. Now he's gone. Will you take his place?"

"I like the cartoons. They make me laugh. They draw the biggiest titties…"

It scares me to think of news going all video. I get pissed off when I click on a news story and as I start reading, a fucking video starts playing. Why do they do this? Why bother to write out an article when they're going to autoplay some loud video with some idiot reading me the story?

Paddy O'Brien?

My high school had a late '60s Black Power book called Look Out Whitey!: Black Power Gon' Get Your Mama!

Richard Pryor, too.