Well, since you asked, Beverly Ratliff from Mansfield, Ohio. Beverly's a 62 year-old former homemaker who now just looks for little ways to pass the time since Roger died from heart disease back in 2012. She likes to watch after her granddaughter when school is out, but now that Madison's winter break is over, it gets…

"Alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright… [gibberish]… alright."

Arugula? Maybe in 1998. That peasants' weed costs less than romaine these days.

Growing up as a young atheist, I would wake early on Sunday to learn from the parables of Ren & Stimpy.

My grandma hosted a Golden Globes ceremony back in the 60s (she was a moderately successful foreign entertainment journalist), so its slow escalation in prestige has had an especially surreal effect on me.

It's a misconception that TFA borrowed heavily from ANH. In Fact, JJ Abrams stole most of the key plot points from my 1993 Star Wars: The Roleplaying Game 2nd Edition campaign in which I brilliantly came up with the idea of the remnants of the Empire building another Death Star that was even bigger and cooler than the…

I predict we'll be all Star Wars'd out around 2028, shortly after we're all Marvel'd out, and then, the stage will be set for a Dick Tracey revival.

French philosophy is sexy like sultry innuendo, imaginative but too vague and prone to misinterpretation. German philosophy is like the frank disclosure of an anal sex fetish, overly precise but more effective at identifying shared idiosyncrasies.

Existentialism, broadly defined, is a form of constructivist realism based on the assertion that the existence of a thing ontologically precedes the essence of a thing. Sartre thought this was a novel and brilliant summation of a concept that had turned philosophy on its head. However, as Heidegger pointed out, it was…

Camus wasn't really a philosopher, so it doesn't make a lot of sense to associate him with an academic tradition in which he wasn't a participant. He was a writer with a worldview that, incidentally, had superficial similarities to certain moral sentiments being expressed by popular academic philosophers at the time,…

This absurd and ultimately meaningless difference is an important one!

Beats never intended to survive. They bought out and killed Mog to pave the way for a more lucrative Apple buyout. I was a Mog subscriber willing to give them a shot, and the Beats rollout was about as competent and professional as the public beta for a Bulgarian MMORPG. I eventually just gave up trying to convince…

The thing that gets my goat about craft brewers is this notion that they're making decent beer available for the first time ever. I'm fine with my fucking Weihenstaphaner, thank you very much.

St. Vincent is too much of a preening Art-eest and reminds me a lot of several experimental musicians I've known personally. They're really into music on some abstract, technical plane that only savant-y talented people can occupy, but when they try to write music on the pop/rock spectrum for a non-musician audience,…

But I don't wanna fuck Debbie Wasserman Schultz.

If goths put that much thought into their lifestyle choices, they wouldn't be goths in the first place.

Personally, I'm hoping Abrams does what he did to Star Trek and Episode VII plays out like a subdued courtroom episode of TNG.

Rewatched this recently and I was surprised how poorly it had aged. Most of the movie is just footage of Rick Moranis moping about the set and calling everyone a bitch.

And there's the telling scene in Episode IV whereupon skeptically examining Luke's penis, Leia remarks that he's a little short for a stormtrooper.

My favorite part was how Anakin's garbled 64-bit smack talk sounded like "You need a bitch slap, buddy!"