You like blue screens that match your pastel interior? Try Windows 8.1 motherfuckers!

You've started to call your penis a "beard"?

Don't call me man, dude.

Your parents were hippies and your middle name is moonglow?

Mavis is dead…

I don't even know what a cuticle is!!!!

Axl's roommate is playing Eve online?

Magnets?

You've also subtracted three chipmunks.. that's cold.

♫It's been♫

That was a horrifying porn parody I could only sit through twice.

You don't even have the staff symbol… she's a witch!!

That sure is some off-white stringy soup…

Oh is it time for "I love film"?

Beaten to it by a real jabroni!

If you count my Thai masseuse, it was 5!

Upwards of fifty dollars!

Reason: The Wire.

I hope it's going to be a Dirty Randy & Raffi type romance!

Huw darrrr heeee!