Sorry, but I'm not going to be deprogrammed. I won't, however, force anyone to listen to "Don't Stop Believin" because I'm aware that just because I'm "music HIV"-positive doesn't mean I have to infect others.

I like Journey. I'm sorry, but I do. Likely because I grew up with them. I still can't hear "Send Her My Love" without getting chills (the story of why that is is too long and boring to relate here).

Yes, I know they were. When I said "Muppets-inspired" I was referring to Henson's original Muppet concept, not saying that they were a knock-off brand.

Atticus Shaffer's line reading of "read" had me howling with laughter EVERY SINGLE TIME.

It hit home for me too. I remember my horror at the communal bathroom at the dorms and then realized that there were no individual shower stalls and almost bought myself a plane ticket home. Then my roommate rushed a fraternity and then started hitting on me and I moved out into a single room across from the RA.

Having experienced life at a healthcare professions university, it is disturbing how many people share this sentiment.

OUT HERE IN THE FIELDS
I CAN'T CHEW MY MEALS
I THREW MY BACK OUT, AM I LIVIN'?
I CAN'T TAKE A WALK
MY BONES ARE CHALK
IT'S MY WHEELCHAIR IN WHICH I'M DRIVEN
YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAAAAAAAAAH

Yeah, and it sucked all the ass ever created in the Universe.

The thing is, The Muppets have always been the group that lampoons this kind of genre. To have them settle into it seriously betrays their fundamental character (or at least changes it so drastically that it feels like a betrayal).

The thing that bugs me about Conan now is that he's built some sort of sad shadow-Tonight for his TBS show. It's so staid and traditional that it barely resembles what made him famous enough in the first place to get Leno's seat.

Don't mistake a subversive side for an "edge," particularly the definition of "edge" as it relates to current programming.

No thanks.

I think if Amy Berg had read Wife No. 19 by Ann-Eliza Young she'd have realized that Jeffs is nearly indistiguishable from Brigham Young.

"Piggy sideboob" is the final nail in the coffin for me with this show. The Muppets were always the characters who maintained a sweetness and joie d'vivre even in the face of calamity and sadness, and the longer I watch them turn into a caustic, unpleasant version of themselves the sadder I get.

I saw the preview for this at Everest in IMAX. Nothing in Everest - not the bridge over the river, not the Khumbu Icefall, not the monstrously-exposed route below and above the Hillary Step - made me so nauseously acrophobic as the friggin' trailer to this movie did.

There has to be, because otherwise how would we ever arrive at Fur10us?

Oh, I did… even got a five dollar bill shoved down my pants. But once my ass hit the seat it was game over.

I went to Rocky Horror only once in high school, and I ended up falling asleep 10 minutes into the show.

I'm not putting another new Simpsons on the DVR until we get to the Septembar season Don Hertzfeldt presaged.

I'm detecting a trend of Michael Schur shortcutting standard TV tropes here. First he subverts the hoary old "she's having a baby" one on Parks and Rec by jumping forward three years, and then on B99 he takes a season-long story arc of "will they or won't they" and "will they find out" &c. and disposes of it in a…