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avclub-686b4726009f9c8ce4e96ef7dfacbfbe--disqus

Wow. That is either a weird fetish, a really lonely kid, or a junior republican getting a head start on fucking nature.

There goes the last shred of innocence from my childhood.

Need to add Whole Foods.

More just a head scratching what the fuck from me. It seems like this product could create an unsanitary situation leading to numerous lawsuits. Assuming anyone would actually buy this shit.

Yup. The idea of Kelly Ripa naked finally did it.

I saw Kelly Ripa modeling it on the MSN homepage. I did a double take and decided to officially change my default homepage.

You may have to wade to the grocery store and the bottom few shelves will have to be emptied, but you should be fine. Small adjustments like shopping carts on pontoons should make things easier. Oh, you mean mergers and acquisitions. Never mind.

Dikachu… Um… I don't know how to put this delicately, but maybe asparagus water isn't the best idea for you.

I think I just got type 2 diabetes looking at this thing.

Amazon will deliver kumquats to my door? Someone needs to look into this immediately. This year, birds began stealing all the citrus off my trees including my beloved kumquats. This is just another instance of big supermarket conspiring with birds to force me to pay for overpriced fruit. Now that Amazon is in on

But only during her shoplifting phase. She is not as interesting since she became Spock's Mom.

It's all fun and games when it is an Obama Julius Caeser, but when it is a Trump lookalike, it just ain't funny.

Yes. Once he was elected I hoped that he would realize the magnitude of that position and actually become a human being. I never expected it to happen, but I hoped. I guess my sentiment could also be explained by Dave Chappelle's SNL monologue right after the election. I gave him a chance, against my better

I wanted him to hire competent people. He did not.

If I wanted that I wouldn't have voted for Hillary Clinton. I hoped it wouldn't be a complete clusterfuck after he got elected. Obviously that didn't happen.

I don't see any pleasure in this. As mortified as I was that Trump was elected, I actually wanted him to hire competent people and have his presidency go well. But everyday with this guy is a new horror and a swift kick in the balls. I just want this guy to go away, but it's not going to happen.

Science fiction being used as a metaphor? Keep this under your hat lest others divine and use this secret.

It's good to be Will Ferrell.

Did they become lovers after The Other Guys? Mark Wahlberg is a decent looking guy, but I'm not leaving Eva Mendes.

So, Kim Jung Un is the bastard spawn of a space cockroach. Explains a lot.