We should all definitely start referring to Philip Seymour Hoffman as "the Hoff." He deserves it way more than that David guy.

It's cause Jackie Onassis said/that it ain't safe for Catholics yet. Think about what they pulled on Kennedy and think about his security - then think about what they might try to pull on you and me.

Don't forget Portland
Come on, guys, don't tell me it's not cool anymore. We have very good cupcakes, and also Colin Meloy!

Yay for a DC Decider!
I don't actually live there, but I want to really badly for some reason. So I appreciate any web site that will enable my delusion that it's a paradise where everything is pantsuits, no makeup, Ian McKaye and The West Wing.

No, Miss Cross was his Rushmore. Wait, what?

And "Dick" is one of the boldest, most honest portrayals of the follies of American power that this country has ever seen. Bruce McCulloch should have won an Oscar.

Wow, you're right! It's totally going to be his Lost In Translation.

It is fail upon fail upon fail.

I feel dumb
I had no idea that Otter and Vice President Hoynes were the same person.

Nope, it really is cuticle frames and shinbone polish. (Sorry to be that guy, but I had to defend my honor.)

Cold Hands by Black Lips. Also! Putty (In Your Hands)!

For all their weird operatic steampunk aspirations (which I love too, by the way), the Decemberists sure do write amazing, sweet little simple love songs. Red Right Ankle is one of them. And "Grace Cathedral Hill" has been one of my favorite songs for years.

Old Fashioned Guy, I can't help but hear your posts read in Tom Lennon's voice punctuated by whistling.

Actually I'm wearing my contemptuous sneakers. They're easy to walk around in, and I have to be ready to move for when the ducks show up.

Or "Hands" by the Raconteurs. Or "Mary Anne With the Shaky Hand" by The Who.

I sold my shinbones to buy you some lovely cuticle frames.

It could be considered a valentine to a very old friend, I suppose. But love songs don't have to be taken literally - the sentiment of that song is very sweet and wistful. I don't know, sometimes it just fits.

Don't forget "I Wanna Hold Your Hand!" It's perfect for that kind of crush where it's brand new, and there's still not a lot of urgency for the sexual kind of stuff, and you'd be completely freaking thrilled and grateful and ecstatic if you could just so much as hold his hand…

Nah man. Nerd pillow talk is the best pillow talk. I'll leave it at that.

I'm partial to Johnny Cash's version of "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face," but that's just because I think Johnny Cash makes everything better.