Every rock song from the 1970s is about cocaine…

Fun Fact 3: I just took a shit in my kitchen sink.

"An oddly heartfelt journey through the wasteland of a techno-collapse.
Gladstone takes an admittedly far-fetched and off-putting story idea and
breathes startling life into it. He gambles here, but he wins. Give it a
read."
—Patton Oswalt

GIMMICK ACCOUNT FIGHT!!!!

"This video is unavailable. Sorry about that."

Take that, black comedians who make fun of our dancing!

I like it too, but I think it would be better if he ended each post with the phrase "Hey there…"

Hey, everyone! Check out Adam Sandler over here!

Hey, everyone! Check out Adolf Hitler over here!

Hey, everyone! Check out 75% of America over here!

Tell you what: over the next three days I'll give you 5000 upvotes. Of course, that means that you'll have to post 5000 comments.

I'm good, thanks.

So…how long before this comment is deleted?

Impossible Mission.

Hey, everyone! Check out nerdlinger over here!

Oh, I see!

Um. What?

Um. What?

Mike sounds like he knows what he's talking about…

Yeah well…my name is Tim Horton and I died while driving a Pantera. Beat that, hotshot!