Apparently not…

Coldplay is to Metallica fans what Metallica is to people who hate Metallica.

Coldplay is to Metallica fans what Metallica is to people who hate Metallica.

Actually, I'm actually just a really old guy. Like, 37 or some shit. I want you all off my lawn.

Actually, I'm actually just a really old guy. Like, 37 or some shit. I want you all off my lawn.

Long threads about "Ironic" on a review of a new Alanis Morrisette album — as predictable as the tides.

Long threads about "Ironic" on a review of a new Alanis Morrisette album — as predictable as the tides.

"Hipsters, that incredibly well-defined subculture of people whom you don't like *and* probably are"

"Hipsters, that incredibly well-defined subculture of people whom you don't like *and* probably are"

Its sucked since the second season, man.

Its sucked since the second season, man.

Very few cartoons are broadcast live. Its a terrible strain on Tom Waits' wrists.

Very few cartoons are broadcast live. Its a terrible strain on Tom Waits' wrists.

Nah; Kurt would've quit the band to do acoustic duets with Michael Stipe.

Nah; Kurt would've quit the band to do acoustic duets with Michael Stipe.

Gleeth — nice to meet someone else who was raised agnostic. Seems like we're a rare breed these days.

Gleeth — nice to meet someone else who was raised agnostic. Seems like we're a rare breed these days.

Seems like the loonies of Scientology are always the new converts — the celebrities who were born in it seem like relatively well-balanced, nice people. (Of course, for all I know, Beck is a mean drunk)

Seems like the loonies of Scientology are always the new converts — the celebrities who were born in it seem like relatively well-balanced, nice people. (Of course, for all I know, Beck is a mean drunk)

…of course, we'd be handing the Republicans the presidency for the rest of time.