He's a legitimate threat the first time you fight him, but he becomes a joke once you beat him at the opera house.

That one's cringeworthy, but there is worse.

Dan's response to CWYWYF stands as a bad call of epic proportions. It's on the same level as Roger Ebert's review of Blue Velvet. Thank fucking Christ for Savage Dik, because it's more obvious than ever that this column jumped the shark a while ago.

It sounded to me less like a problem and more like a curious matter he didn't know how to explain. Or maybe the situation's a lot more Seinfeldian than he's letting on and it really is a huge deal.

The current plan is to get a room to crash in (which I've been working on to no avail so far), catch a Greyhound bus on up and then see what I can do about finding work. Maybe I'm putting things in the wrong order, but that's the sequence that makes the most sense in my head.

I say take the job and make the move, but look before you leap. Make sure you've got both living arrangements squared away, backup plans in case something somewhere blows up in your face and room to retreat if Denver doesn't work out period. If you know anyone in the Denver area, touch base with them. And don't forget…

That was basically the same point I was trying to make earlier, only better articulated. Well done.

Seeing as it's well-established that this lady's looking to settle down and you're not, if I were in your shoes here, I'd err on the side of caution and not pursue another fling with her. If she's dead set on marriage and family and all you want is a repeat of last summer, that tells me you're heading in different…

Getting exes involved in the sexual ongoings of a current relationship is tempting fate, period. It doesn't matter if all parties involved are up for it and a clear set of ground rules have been laid out.

Amen. UNCL brought it on himself, though. Some things are better expressed with words than looks.

Seconding @disqus_1no2P2ZWjS:disqus here. I'd also like to add that mentally reading it in Crow's voice makes it that much funnier.

Yeah, perhaps. But this is Dan Savage we're talking about here. Being delicate runs counter to who he is as a writer, a columnist and a person.

It doesn't matter which ending you see PA1 with, because it's a piece of shit with no redeeming qualities. It's not unheard of for a less-than-great horror movie to have enjoyable sequels (I'm thinking specifically of Friday the 13th, which is 85% dishwater and 15% Betsey Palmer, and Child's Play, which doesn't have…

I miss the days when bands like Mr. Bungle, Soul Coughing, Mercury Rev, Drive Like Jehu, Bomb and [insert applicable Kurt Cobain pet band here] had a feasible chance of getting major-label record deals. Granted, these things only ever happened because the majors were angling for another Nevermind-scale hit and not…

So you met her at sleepaway camp, huh. Is her name Angela, by any chance? *SPOILERS* Because Angela is really a boy. *END SPOILERS*

Don't you mean a Festivus miracle?

As far as leveling goes, there's always the Cave of Trials…provided you know where it is and
how to get there.

I will contend to this day that Vice City is GTA at its only-here-for-Godzilla, "I don't care about the missions, I just wanna fuck shit up" peak. San Andreas didn't have much to add to the mix and IV, with its overhauled physics and Niko's relative feebleness in comparison to player characters from GTAs past, didn't…

DKC. Haven't been back to that in a dog's age.

No, you're not making a bigger deal out of it than you should. Yours is a legitimate cause for concern.