I think she probably doesn't care about Black or Brown bears.

There's such a thing as too illiterate for twitter?

She's not quite dead yet, but don't worry - Sam Bee and Seth Meyers will finish her off.

We're here. We're queer. We don't want anymore unqualified assholes who married into money and don't even understand the thing they're allegedly an expert on.

<genre> is dead.

Ooga chukka ooga ooga ooga chukka

The way I feel when you say that makes me equally oppressed.

Aaaaaand 2010s pop culture has disappeared up its own asshole.

Not even once.

We're not a pizza company, we're a pizza family (that makes really shitty pizza and also we're a pizza company and our owner is a raging douchebag).

Just like blue M&Ms and red M&Ms.

New York, then Detroit, then anything else that isn't St. Louis, then dying in a fire, then St. Louis.

Saying Blumenthal lied, that Gorsuch never said anything about Trump's "disheartening" behavior. Making up some lie about Blumenthal not having served during Vietnam.

Translation: "Yeah, it should have been an Asian woman, but, bitch, do you think I was going to pass this up?"

I love this story, because it makes me feel morally superior about the fact that I buy most of my clothing from Nordstrom Rack.

I really appreciate Netflix's commitment to children's television that doesn't make parents want to kill themselves.

I love The King Is Dead so hard. I know it's not most hardcore fans' choice, but there's not a song I ever skip on it. It's damn near perfect.

Johnny Poomonic?

Dear Black People-

Oh my god please make this for real please make this for real please make this for real.