I know lots of deer white people in Michigan.

Meanwhile, Ted Nugent wasn't too political for my neighboring town's rib fest.

He fixes the cable?

Can Donald Trump read? thread.

Remember when they made a Criminal Minds spin off and she was in it for some reason?

I'm getting a James Franco as Luke Wilson as Tommy Wiseau vibe.

That sketch where John Travolta plays a gay-panicked Dracula is one of the most uncomfortable things I've ever seen.

We didn't even queue up Sarah McLachin's "Angel" when we recorded it, the audio just showed up on the webcam footage.

First you say we can't call Sandy Hook a hoax, then you say we can't mourn the Bowling Green victims. It's, like, get it straight, libtards.

Cash Me Ousside The Boundaries of Legitimate Psychotherapy - The Dr. Phil Story.

I call mine Ellie The Existential Ennui Elephant.

"That being said, it's mind-blowing that the president(ish) of the United States would say these things and not pretend American Exceptionalism is a thing."

People keep trying to find "the meaning behind" all of his actions, as if there has to be a deeper than surface level meaning to all of his weird actions and beliefs.

Sometimes we make The White Stripes.

You'll bitch about how much you hate it but you'll just keep drinking it and drinking it.

Because Yaaaaaas Queen, Fierce, Feminism with Glitter and Thongs

What Neil Gorusch looks like today is stunning.

Yeah, but we just have to wait and see what he does.

Then he'd just have to deal with water costing $20 a gallon.

Matthew McConaughey or David Brooks Twitter Bot?