What ho! Such alluring inelegance in this harlot! To what perversions doth my sudden carnality owe? I am erotic like a stallion.

Laughable that this piece of shit gets the same grade as Only God Forgives.

Re-watched I Want to Believe recently. Such a frustrating movie, as it is gorgeously shot and has a nice low-key narrative, but is also just hopelessly marred by bad decisions like the George W poster and the presence of Xzibit.

I don't remember a color sequence in Raging Bull.

"Because I wrote my verse in two days, Taylor Swift cannot beat Beyoncé…but you will blow me first."

I don't know or care who this guy is, but I'm sure glad I don't live in Big Brother France.  Their "anti-hate" laws are the stuff of Orwellian nightmare, and Twitter should be fucking ashamed for identifying users to the French government.

Also, I'll just leave this quote from John Hodgman discussing Kubrick over at the Dissolve.

Doesn't matter, he's still Ug-Lee hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Nope.  When I'm watching a "pretty, visually-arresting" movie, I'm admiring the director's vision and craft.  I'm appreciating the unique brand of entertainment that is a series of masterfully composed moving pictures.  The most important elements of a film are mood, tone, atmosphere, style, etc.  Story is bred out of…

Bronson is not a great movie and really quite amateurish.  I can assure you, as someone who shares your love of Drive, that Valhalla Rising is excellent.

Comic Con needs to be stripped down to essentials and renamed Breakfast with Shatner.

There are two kinds of film critics: those who understand that film is a visual medium first and foremost, and those that immediately jump to reviewing the "plot" and characterization because they essentially regard movies as just a shortcut to reading a book. 

Same here.  It's like Dowd inadvertently wrote a gushing review by not understanding what the point of film is.

It is to lust! O the rivers of semen I have spilt in deference to the Lady Wiig, whilst in solitude or betwixt the prying eyes of mine concubine!

Re-Red

In a few minutes, bitch.

Sharknadeux

Bitches love sociopathic killers.  Verily.

When I first glanced upon the lady's countenance, my mind did present to me a most taxing quandary: would such appearance afford a bang, or would my time and resources be more dutifully applied to other matters?  After much deliberation and a rather frightening bout of erotic fantasizing, I resolved at once that…

Anybody else remember the 3D Smell-O-Vision Revenge of the Nerds TV-Movie Event that Fox pulled back in the 90's?  Those were the days.  Back when Fox was classy.